How's it going, Reader?

I don't think there's anyone new here... the program I use to send these says no one new has joined in the past 30 days which means we are going to skip the intros and the blah blahs and get right to the pupdates and gossip!

The Ampersand Trilogy redesign and reformat for all eBooks and Paperbacks is complete. It took 6 hours of my Sunday, but by golly... they are all live and updated on the Amazon. eBook updates for Without Regret on my website are still pending and I might... might... get a few paperbacks for my site. Let me know if you'd be interested. 🤔

Shop the 'Zon

I still have copies of Witching and Scheming! Thought scammers keep trying to shop my site, I have a decent shop partner whose blocked 3 unauthorized purchases now. Boom! Take that criminals!

Disfigured copies of Witching and Scheming ship free in the US with the code SHIPME and since I can't figure out how to make things work otherwise-if you get a disfigured book, the whole book order ships free (Bookish merch shipped by 3rd party print on demand is excluded). There are only three of these and they need homes!

Shop all Paperbacks!

Not sure what's going on yet? Neither am I! But this newsletter will show up periodically with pet pics, updates on my books, my life and messages from Chief Communications Officer, Padfoot!

Why I Haven't Killed Larry (and other behind the scenes knowledge of the Cyn and Winnie-verse)

Awhile back, I shared one of my favorite reviews ever on social media (posted on BookBub). It was for Digging Through Dirty Laundry and the reader expressed how much she hated the character of Larry and wished I’d murdered him and paired her off with Cruz.

So… I thought I would share some insights, back story and maybe a little TMI details about the characters and their inspiration.

When I wrote the original thriller trilogy, one of the biggest complaints I got was that there was “too much backstory” and no one needed to know the characters as well as I did. It ruined flow and pacing… But, since you’re here, prepare to be backstoried! (ALSO- Major Spoilers. If you haven’t read the series and you care deeply about the romantic subplot, skip ahead to where you see the **)

The reason I never killed Larry is pretty simple: he’s the only vet in Sweet Pea and Winnie has a tendency to eat things she’s not supposed to. He may be annoying, a bit of a misogynist and a git to boot, but he is a pretty damn good doctor. After the regular vet went off on her cruise and never returned, he kind of became essential to the community and I couldn’t do that to the animals. You might be thinking “Just hire another vet” and I might? But where would they work? The old vet was technically doing her work out of the animal shelter and they converted that space into a shelter for the stray cats she left behind. Maybe Cyn could help rehome some of those cats to be barn cats and eat mice because they wanted to be feral in the first place, but one problem at a time.

I never wanted Cyn to date Larry. I kind of hated his character from the beginning but one of the early readers said I was being petty by bringing up their rocky elementary school / high school / college friendship as a reason to shut him down. As a person, I am petty AF and take my grudges to the grave. It takes a lot to piss me off to the point of no forgiveness, but once I’m there- you will never evolve enough for me to forgive you. But, I went with her advice and let them get together. I truly thought over time I wouldn’t hate them as a couple, but as you can tell by the fact they broke up in Growling and stayed broken up through Itching, I have no intention of them getting back together, like ever. As far as Cruz goes… I don’t really know what I’m doing with him. He’s like… that one really good hook-up you had that one time in your early 20s that’s a great memory, but you don’t know if long term it would have been all that great because despite the really good D…

Actually, my mom reads this newsletter, so I’m going to stop this thought. But what they have in common is physical, including their history of combat and relationship compatibility. If you don’t know, you don’t know. And that’s cool too. But I don’t really think they work either and he’s a total flight risk… like worse than her. So what even is he doing coming back so often besides scratching an itch? I think he kind of sucks too.

Levi is basically sniffable wallpaper… I find him bland and may need to either fix his character or send him on his merry way. Also, it’s a little troubling he didn’t know his uncle was a turd ball. Like yeah, that’s kind of my fault, because I could have told him but like… he’s kind of one of those smart guys who’s clueless about the world. Also... if he'd known it would have ruined the story.

Maybe I hate everyone she’s dated. No one is good enough for my girl.

**Daniel Kirby is based on a guy I went to high school with named Sean. I had the biggest crush on him and regularly was ridiculous to make him laugh hoping I would be something more than the fat awkward girl who occasionally got overstimulated and shut down like an overheated laptop (girls didn’t have autism in the early aughts, we were just emotional and dramatic).

Fun fact, not knowing what raw toast is will not get a boy to like you.

He kept getting with a girl named J. Carter (yup, that’s where Carter came from) who cheated on him… like a lot and I don't just mean kissing other dudes. And she kept getting credit for being “so smart” but… whatever. She was everything I wasn’t and could never be and she had a shit-talking streak that I was on the wrong end of more than once. I also had a best friend named Amber R. who was basically the queen bitch of our social group and that is where Amber came from. She was an aggressive, narcissistic hot girl that played everyone and I ran into a guy who crushed on her during school almost 10 years after high school and he was still salty that they were "talking" but then she was suddenly dating Josh. AKA the guy who knocked her up when she dropped out of college and they had a shotgun wedding that ultimately ended a few years and a couple more kids later. (Oh my dog, the DRAMA! Also, birth control people!)

These two are the amalgam that created Amber Carter, but honestly, she is so much dumber than either of them and they were both super short. Aside from the name, the scent and the aversion to commitment, the character has nothing in common with either of them. I just needed a name of someone I wouldn't mind being the obnoxious non-villain that I could dump on and hate without feeling bad. It is namesake petty vengeance, the stuff I live for.

Daniel on the other hand…

His character inspo welded several bike frames together to make a twelve foot tall bike and broke his leg falling off it in high school. This boy could be found crying over Carter one week and making out with her the next only for her same mouth to be wrapped around another boys... never mind.

Alas, the reason Daniel Kirby is the BIGGEST IDIOT is after graduation, Sean joined the navy. I was 2 years behind but graduated a year early, so only one. I was on winter break from my freshman year of college and working at my old amusement park job (they let me keep it even though I went to school out of state and I worked there on all my college breaks) and I saw a guy who looks just like him working security at the front of the park where I was with the costume characters.

And the nametag said Sean.

So I wave and then we all go on lunch and I see him outside the employee cafeteria. I go over and say hi, I thought you joined the navy. How’s it going?

And he’s like “What? Who are you? What high school did you go to?”

And I answered and he’s like “No, not me. I went to Quartz Hill.”

Then he disappears.

Now, let me explain the true idiocy of this. 1) where I’m from, there are not going to be a lot of guys named Sean, let alone spelled Sean. I knew four Chris's and three Jose's but there was only one Sean. 2) we were in Santa Clarita, 45 minutes from where our high school was. He’d have sold the lie better if he picked one in that area. 3) the dude copied my biology homework when I was a freshman, and he was a junior, FOR A YEAR! I know what his dumb face looks like. Also I still have pictures of us when we were in JROTC.

Anyway, that is why the character of Daniel Kirby exists as the world’s biggest moron. Unlike Amber, I have no idea what became of Sean after this interaction. He could have two-dozen kids, he could have found love in the arms of a burly navy man named Steve. Honestly, he stopped being important ages ago, but when you write a character forced back into a home town she was desperate to escape, you start thinking about your own hometown you were desperate to escape and some wrongs you just feel like making right some 20 years later.

And then it feels so good, you keep them going for 9+ books.

In case you missed it, I am, as I said, Petty AF.

Unlike the character though, his mom was super cool. She chaperoned our military ball and we were talking with her in the bathroom where I was hiding out from the noise and the heat with a friend sitting on me (it was high school...🤷‍♀️) . Mrs. Kirby taught us the very important lesson that at some point we'd reach an age where we could not go braless in a dress and at the time I did not believe her.

But, she was right. Gravity is a bitch that comes for us all.

Personally...

After park and bath, we finally got Padfoot his cake and birthday presents. He looked so cute as our beloved Sirius Black. Perry celebrated an amazing snow day, I finally got her added to my dog tribute arm tattoo and we protested the current "president" on president's day and the lack of accountability, checks and balances at the state capitol. We will not abide an oligarchy, not after how hard out ancestors fought to never again have a king. Well, mine fought to not have white people here at all but they were slaughtered. #oneproblematatime

Overall, my acid reflux has been out of control, my anxiety is through the roof and if I could also bury my face in snow and never come out, I would.

Except a lot of it is yellow and you know what that means.

Yup, someone dropped their lemon snow cone. 😂🤣😂

Padfoots Periodicals / Pals

Thank you for all the pet pics last month! You have no idea what it meant to me that you all still send them. Keep being kind, showing love when you can and fighting back when you must.

Never let them take your heart.

Lub, Da Padfoot (& CEO Perry)

WE GOT PALS THIS WEEK!!!!

My furblings Belle and Maxy being twinsies.